Wednesday, December 24, 2008

A Story for Present Passing

Hi All!

Every year, my dad's side of the family gathers for a dinner and gift exchange. Since no one really needs anything anymore and there are no little children, the gifts are small and the emphasis is on the fun instead of the gift. Part of the fun is the traditional "present passing story." I say traditional because HAVING a present passing story is the tradition. Each year the story itself is different. For the past several years I have been in charge of writing the story.

This year I would like to share it with you.

Oh - the way the "present passing story" works is that each time the word right is said, the presents (still unwrapped) are passed one person to the right. Each time the word left is said, the presents are passed one person to the left. At the end of the story everyone opens the present they ended up with.

Here we go!

A long, long time ago, RIGHT before that certain big event that LEFT an indelible mark on everyone's memory, a tiny baby boy was born. The boy's mother, RIGHT out of high school and with all of her previously bright aspirations slipping RIGHT out of her grasp, wasn't too happy. After all, having a baby LEFT her with few options.

Thinking about her ruined future, the mother made a decision. Wrapping the tiny baby up, she kissed him RIGHT on the tip of his nose and LEFT him on the doorstep of the wealthiest people she knew, the McRIGHTsons.

Scrugg McRIGHTson was the RIGHT tackle for the town's semi-not-close-to-professional football team. He was a large man. Rowena, his lovely bride, was the last member LEFT of the town's founding family.

Rowena and Scrugg adopted the tiny boy and named him Norbert. After a few years, the McRIGHTsons were worried that something wasn't quite RIGHT with Norbert. He never seemed to grow. At the age of fourteen, he was only three foot six! In Scrugg's mind, the only option LEFT was to send Norbert to military school to toughen him up. Surely that would set everything RIGHT.

So, tiny Norbert set off for the military school. At first, he did very well since he was naturally very tidy and liked the tight organization. The only trouble was the marching. Every morning, noon, and night, the cadets gathered on the parade grounds to practice their marching. The drill sergeant would chant:



All of the cadets marched RIGHT along. Except for Norbert.

Poor Norbert, with his tiny, little legs just couldn't keep up. He would do a LEFT and a RIGHT and the cadet behind him would walk RIGHT over his head! Soon, the entire squad had LEFT Norbert behind. The drill sergeant was very upset and made Norbert practice even after the other cadets LEFT.

It wasn't uncommon to see Norbert, all alone, on the parade grounds marching and chanting:


However, no matter how he tried, poor Norbert just couldn't get his legs to stretch enough for his stride to match that of the other cadets. And yet, Norbert continued to try.

One night, RIGHT at midnight, Norbert was out practicing his marching but, something was different. Each time he stepped, he heard a little jingle.

LEFT (jingle), LEFT (jingle), LEFT (jingle), RIGHT (jingle), LEFT (jingle).

Looking up, Norbert was shocked to see Santa marching RIGHT along with him.

Stopping, Norbert asked Santa what he was doing there. Santa chuckled and told him that he was really an elf. His mother, you see, was an elf who had LEFT the North Pole to find a better future. She hadn't planned on a baby though and was embarrassed to call Santa for help so she LEFT Norbert with the McRIGHTsons.

Later, the poor mother had returned to the North Pole and told Santa everything. RIGHT away, Santa headed out to find Norbert and to return him to his RIGHTful place.

Santa whisked Norbert away from the military academy and took him to the North Pole where Norbert fit RIGHT in since everyone was only three foot six! Finally, Norbert was completely happy but, sometimes in his dreams he was still out on the parade grounds chanting:


I hope you enjoyed the story! Have a very Merry Christmas!


Voice Update: I did it! I did my exercises yesterday! I can put up a number 1 on my little chart! Can I make it for day number two? I hope so! Check in tomorrow to find out!


Mama Goose said...

How cute! What a neat idea. Sounds like a great tradition. Have fun!

Merry Christmas to you too!

Mental P Mama said...

Yay for Norbert! And Merry Christmas to you!

noble pig said...

I always do this in my son's classes with candy during a holiday party, the kids love it and it makes laugh crazily!

Merry Christmas.

Hi! I'm Grace said...

You are a great story teller. Worth reading.
Have a happy new year, Trisha and to the family. :)